Characteristics Of True Love In Marriage – By Philip Quateh:
We have three types of love in marriage.
We have the Agape love(unconditional love), Philo love(brotherly love) and the Eros (romantic).
All the three types of love is very important for every marriage. If a marriage can stand, all the three must be included or work together.
But to identify a true love in marriage, you have to check firstly the unconditional love. The unconditional love your spouse shows to you determines how much he or she loves you.
In the scriptures, women are told to respect their husbands and in Ephesians too, they are told to submit unto their heads which is the husband.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
For the man to determine how the woman loves him is how the woman submit unto him.
To submit unto your husband means to be obedient unto him, to humble yourself for him, to second him as you are one with him.
When a woman is submissive, she loves the husband, she agrees with the husband, she makes sure she will show all the types of love unto the husband without a condition.
Without a condition!
When a woman truly loves the husband, she will not say, “I love him but” neither “I can only love him if he do this for me or that for me”
Authentic love or true love does not base on materialism but from the heart. For a woman loving a man is like protecting her hair from unpleasant smell or any other destructions or filtness, always paying attention to the hair, giving it time and dressing it always.
A true woman will not base on any condition but always open her heart for the man.
When a man loves a woman, is like the man protecting himself.
For the true love for a man to be identified, you can only see it how he pays much attention to the wife, caring and giving his time, heart and everything unto the woman.
So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
It can cost a true man everything to show his love to a woman she truly love.
For men, love comes from sacrifices, and unconditionalities.
From all these, true love identify itself in the marriage when love as a subject appears in the marriage as an object😍🤩😘, it carries many characteristics.
According to 1 Corinthians 13:1-13, it shows us the characteristics of love as a personality and these are some of it personalities;
1 Corinthians 13:4
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
When there’s agape love or true love in the marriage, either the man or the woman suffers long, meaning, when there is no money or money is present, either the man or the woman will show love and will never breakup or will not be tired of showing love.
True love is also kind. The woman or the man is very kind and shows benovalence in the marriage. He or she gives her best in the marriage and does not show selfish acts or do not become hardened of what one want or need at at go, such as buying what she or he requests if you have the money and responding to all necessary calls in marriage such as the romantic love etc.
If there’s a true love in the marriage there is no envy as well.
There shouldn’t be any hatred or malignity, for hatred and malignity creates way for the enemy in the marriage to separate the marriage or cause destructions to the marriage.
One have to show contend with all what she or he recievs. You shouldn’t create rivalry between each other in materialism or whatever. So far as you’ve all become one flesh, it means you all own the same things one have acquired.
True love in marriage is identified when one does not become proud or vaunted.
As I said, when we talk about a woman who submit unto a man, she is a woman who is humble.
A true love is also shown from the man unto the woman if he really love her from the heart, he obeys the woman as well and do not behave proudly on the woman as if she is slave unto him.
True love does not show prideness or is not puffed up.
When a woman shows prideness , she tells the husband “you are not of my class”, “you are useless”, “you are no more my size” etc… and the men also can do same which shows pride.
When one get money then if there is no true love, he or she will start saying, “you are not her class” or behave unseemly etc.
True love does not behave itself unseemly.
One cannot have another wife or love apart from the one he or she told, “I will love you till death separate us”.
If one does what goes contrary then he or she is not faithful. Even if the man was not able to see it, there was no loyalty or faithfulness. Others can go to the extend of bringing her girlfriend or boyfriend to the house (side chick) and make love with him/her.
One cannot internationally do always what one hate or dislike in life.
There should be unity, humble personality and true affection for each other.
Love does seek her own.
If you really love your spouse, you will never be selfish but rather be open hearted, kind and raise each other to grow in every aspect of life.
One should not look for what brings him or her peace alone but seek for what will make them both peaceful in life.
It can be shown when one shows kindness or benovalence.
Love is not easily provoked.
You don’t act with anger even when one offends you or your spouse offends you in marriage. You are careful to react towards whatever you hear about each other outside and even show love if one goes wrong.
Love does not think evil. The spouse will not think always negative opinions about the other or the partner. You even defend him or her if one want to destroy her/him. You always take a careful investigation on whatever seems challenging to you, you don’t go angrily and with negative mindset about your spouse. The opinions of others shouldn’t be prioritized in the marriage but let the love you have for your partner be prioritize in your mind and marriage.
True love does not rejoice in iniquity. You are not happy when your husband or your wife falls or makes a mistake.
You are not also happy in doing wrong which your spouse will not see (the inward sin).
You have to be very faithful to yourself and show love. You are always joyful to hear good news about each other not evil or wrong or bad.
You plan good for each other and pray for success, pray for better things to blow up in the marriage.
Some always show distrust and also feel some negative convictions about the other which shouldn’t be, it really kills what we call the Agape love in marriage.
It is not any situations or events that is to occure or that had already occured that must be broadcasted out to people,friends or family, you have to learn what must be kept a secret between you a secret else someone outside can even destroy your marriage through the words of mouth.
Solve problems that does not need any other support if necessary.
You always rejoice in the truth. If your partner says, “I steal before I buy something for ourselves, you are not happy about it” but if he should say I earned this or that amount from my work without stealing from anyone or from the work, you should rejoice.
Some always show distrust and also feel some negative convictions about the other which shouldn’t be, it really kills what we call the true love in marriage. Hallelujah
True love also shows steadfastness in marriage despite what happens. Even if there are unexpected things going on in the marriage.
You don’t have to fail each other when there is persecution, hard times, sorrow or when anything wrong happends. Show steadfastness.
For the wife of Job left him when Job lost all his properties and sons. You have to endure all things and at the end of every battle, there is a crown, uplifting and glory from above.
1 Corinthians 13:7-8
Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
Charity never faileth
Glory be to Jesus!
You have to be very very joyful in marriage, joy can be stolen from marriage when the negative aspects of these personalities are shown in marriage.
Becareful and be steadfast.